The second biggest eating day of the year, behind thanksgiving, is here. SUPERBINGE, I mean super bowl, Sunday.
I thought of all of you this morning as I was in line at a popular doughnut shop. Yes, you read that right. I’ve been craving a doughnut all week and we decided we would get one this morning after the gym. DOUGHNUTS ON SUPERBOWL SUNDAY? Even though we will pig out tonight? Yup. That’s what I used to think. Actually, I used to think, “Why not doughnuts? I’m already gonna eat shit tonight!” But, then I realized I’m not scared of later. I can have my doughnut now, in this moment, and not have it effect later. HOW???
So that’s what I asked myself. How am I able to eat a doughnut this morning without those thoughts of “screwing up” or “ruined it anyway” coming up.
Then I asked myself the bigger question. WHY ARE YOU SCARED OF FOOD? WHY DO PEOPLE FEAR FOOD? While I have a couple reasons, the biggest reason I believe is because we feel like we cannot control ourselves around food. Yes, we fear what it will do to our appearance, but if we could control it then it wouldn’t negatively effect our appearance, right? Therefore, we fear it because we struggle to control it.
Why can’t we control it? Because we restrict. We either physically restrict by NOT eating “bad” foods or we do eat them and then proceed down the body bashing path… telling ourselves we are gross, we screwed up, we blew our diet, we are fat, we are gonna be fat anyway, etc. Clouds of guilt, shame, and regret pile up and the only way out is to vow to restrict again tomorrow. To get back in the wagon tomorrow. To start a new diet. To finally be able to control our food. All the while never actually listening to our bodies! Just tightening the reigns. More white knuckling trying to control food and life all accompanied with mental anguish.
HOWEVER. What if SUPERBINGE Sunday was just like any other day? And you allowed yourself to eat chicken wings any day? Today, tomorrow, April 26? Would you still eat them today? Would you still eat 20 of them? Would you even WANT to??
That’s the trick. Shhh, don’t tell anyone I’m telling you this.
The switch that is waiting to be flipped starts with allowance. Allowance is a pretty cool chick. See, she looks like a bitch because she takes the fun out of typical things like milkshakes, Christmas cookies, birthday cake and chocolate because they are no longer such “super special food occasions.” Once you get to know her, you realize she’ll let you have milkshakes, Christmas cookies, birthday cake and chocolate anytime you want it. Anytime you REALLY, honestly want it! And because you can have it any time, allowance talks to choice. And choice let’s you DECIDE if you actually do want it! See, sometimes choice gets bullied by control. Control likes to run the show. You feel safer if control is in the driver’s seat because then you won’t overeat. But, eventually, control runs you off track because she gets tired of the bullshit. Sometimes control actually wants to let choice and allowance drive. Actually, all the time. Because control has better things to do in your life than analyze every food and workout and follow the rules you made with her.
Control used to be scared to let choice and allowance take over, but once she did, she felt SO RELIEVED. And she was even happier because then she wasn’t called on to do even more driving the next day when you were only allowed to eat veggies and water.
Are you following this analogy?
Control never wins.
The trick to not bingeing starts with allowing yourself the opportunity to choose your food, each and every time. In doing that, you aren’t controlling, you don’t feel restricted and you are much less likely to binge.
(If binge eating is a constant, serious struggle for you, this may require more details than I can give in this blog, so message me.)
The point is that SUPERBINGE Sunday doesn’t have to be SUPERBINGE Sunday. It can be just like any other day. And so can tomorrow. And that mindset shift brought me SO MUCH PEACE.
I am no longer scared of special occasions and holidays. They are no longer days that inevitably would throw me off track for a day, if not longer. They are no longer only about for me. Don’t get me wrong, I love food. I’m a foodie. But this year, we are making tacos with chips and guacamole. Our dessert is chocolate dipped strawberries.
You don’t even want to know what it USED to be, but if you relate to this blog, you already know.
Because I was you.
And you can breakthrough this cycle. All you have to do is get control to let choice and allowance drive. You may not trust them yet, but believe me. They had yearssssss of driving before control took over. They know you best. You just have to listen.
Until next time,
Go Bills 😉