The next best diet. The mindset to win. The workout that will burn 1000 calories. Train this way. Eat that way. Think like this. Eat this many calories. Eat this few carbs. Do this workout. Eat this much protein. Drink this shake. Do cardio fasted. Lift weights first. Rest this much. Take this supplement. Workout with music. Workout with a partner. Don’t eat past 7:00 pm. Meditate. ETC. ETC. ETC.
Our problem is NOT that we don’t know enough. Our problem is that we may very well know too much. We are not living in a deficit of information these days, especially when it comes to food, fitness and weight loss. We are inundated with information, often conflicting if not forever fluctuating, and we can’t tell our head from our ass when it comes to the BEST way to do anything anymore.
Guess why? The best way for you may not be the best way for me! We can pretty much find facts to prove or disprove whatever we want, depending what we want to believe. But we just want the right answer. We want someone to tell us what to do. Tell us what will work. Tell us the best workout and the magic diet. Tell us how to think, eat, workout and we will follow it if it means we get the body of our dreams.
But what happens if you just keep listening to everyone else? To everything else? What happens when the next book comes out or you find the next best blog where THIS TIME IT WILL WORK. Has it worked yet? Do you think the perfect answer just hasn’t been discovered yet? Who is going to discover it? And when? And what will you do until then?
If there is one thing I can offer you as a coach, it is experience. It is two decades of experiments, personal experiments. It began with an idea, followed up by research, and ended with implementation. See, what good is information if it just stays words on a page? This goes for my blog too. What good is reading these every week if you don’t try to implement any of it? Trust me, I understand how easy it is to get information and how difficult it is to implement. BUT, if you never implement it, you will never know anything. It will all just be useless to you. It’s just taking up space in your head instead of filling up a void in your life. A void that is dying to be filled with the answer that works for you. But, you will never know what works for you if you never try.
So, for two decades, I have been implementing. I have been implementing the ever changing information to see what it does for me. I have done A LOT. Low calories, very low calories, anorexia, compulsive behavior, over training, bingeing, figure competitions, tracking my food, workout slumps, yo-yo dieting, low carbs, high fat, weight watchers, cleanses, Advocare, Isagenix, whey protein, BCAAs, vitamin D, intermittent fasting, fasted cardio, crossfit, bootcamps, slow and steady cardio, HIIT workouts, reiki, life coaching, counseling, running, walking, kickboxing, boxing, workout classes… you catch my drift? And through it all, my weight varied within a range of 25-30 pounds. Did anything work? Well, how do you define “work?” Sure, I lost weight. Sure, I gained weight. And guess were I am today? The same weight I was ten years ago.
TEN YEARS AGO. BEFORE I TRIED ALL OF THESE THINGS!!!!!!
So, no, none of this worked really. Not in my definition. No diet or way of eating worked. No specific workout style worked. No counseling worked. My WEIGHT is still where it was when I was I graduated high school. It’s still where it was when I graduated college. It’s still where it was when I got married. And where it was when I got divorced. It’s still where it was when I opened my gym and when I became an aunt for the first time. NOTHING changed my weight long term. Because between all of those weights, were weights above and below it. And so, unfortunately, I have no perfect answer for you. UNTIL YOU IMPLEMENT ANY OF THIS INFORMATION, be it from the internet, your doctor, your best friend, your trainer, or from me, you will never know the answer FOR YOU. Because you see, the answer is different for everyone. I would be lying to you if I told you what will work for you. All I can tell you is that dieting will not work for you. Relying on will power and self-controlling behaviors because you do not trust yourself will not work for you. Choosing control over choice will not work for you. And choosing information over implementation will not work for you.
You want to know what will work? Trial and error. Experience. Learning yourself. Trusting yourself. Paying attention to yourself. My list of trials and errors may be two decades long, but that two decades less I have to spend figuring this shit out for myself.
So, if you read my blog, if you train with me, if you watch my videos and you love my posts… do something. I don’t expect you to figure it out on your own or take two decades to do it like I did, that’s why I offer my coaching, my guidance. But, at the very least, be your own health advocate. Whatever you decide to implement, pay attention to what it does for you. What do YOU need. What works for YOU. Only YOUR BODY can figure this out and only YOUR BODY knows it. But if all you do is read to your body, this is how your body will stay.
Your body is your friend. She actually wants to work WITH YOU, not against you. But if you keep beating her into submission, what do you expect her to do? Treat yourself with care, though we may have muscles and a will to handle whatever life throws at us, deep down, we are still as fragile as the way we came into this world. And wouldn’t it be a shame to keep thinking that someone OTHER THAN YOUR BODY knows what is best for you? The audacity really.
So read my blogs. Like my posts. Watch my videos. Message me. All of it. I APPRECIATE IT ALL. But also, DO SOMETHING. If you don’t like how you feel, implement a new way. It doesn’t have to be huge. Until I changed my mindset, nothing changed. And that took ACTION. It took IMPLEMENTATION not just information.
So this is my tough love to you today. Life is meant to be enjoyed and if you are waiting until you lose weight to enjoy it, you are doing yourself and your life a MAJOR disservice. Pick something. Implement it. And take notes. Before you know it, you’ll find YOUR way.
Want a hint? The answer lies beyond restriction, control and stress, at the intersection of self-care and self-trust.
I’m here if you need help.